Anxiety Issues

This is week 5 of being on this Imunovir pill, however, this is the week I am off it so things are chill for now. I sang for my friend's first mass on Sunday and was so nervous, but did fine which was great! It was nice singing again. My nerves were shot from stage fright, but again I survived it and am glad I pushed myself to do it.
Since I last posted I've pretty much been experiencing the same fatigue issues, and now, if I didn't mention if before, I get throbbing headaches nearly every day. It's doubtful that the Imunovir was causing them since I get them even when I'm not taking them so who knows why they're starting up so much. I made an appointment with Dr. Gobbie today to see if my neck is out of alignment. Yes, I only have 5 sessions left, but I need to go see him. My body needs it.
Aside from those symptoms, my body seems to be experiencing this feeling of anxiety. It's as though my body is often in the fight or flight mode, but for no given reason. My heart is racy and yet nothing is wrong.
I go to see the natural doc today and will give his report when I get back later, but for now. tata...

Fabulous Lecture RE: CFS.

So sick of being tired

I'm not sure if it's the Imunovir or me, but my body is suffering more fatigue than I've felt in a long time. I don't mean just sleepiness, I mean extreme exhaustion and a sense that I can't even get myself up from a chair. It hit me last night about 2 am even though I was supposed to be asleep, I woke up with this sense of nervousness and dread and then I went to go to the bathroom and felt as though I was carrying a ten pound bag of bricks. Just like when you get anesthesia and are about to go to sleep. I tossed all night long and couldn't sleep at all. My husband is out of town for two days on business and I am home alone with the kids, which is going OK but never ideal. I'm doing the least amount possible so that I don't get too stressed and then aggravate my symptoms.
Also, I've started looking more into Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. The nat doc diagnosed me as having it, but I honestly haven't researched it much until recently. The sad thing about it is that no one knows what causes it or how to treat it. Great, however, I'm going to start praying that God will show someone the cure. It's so incredibly common and yet we still don't know anything about it save for what it does to people? Goes to show you how little we know even in our developed age.
Another symptom that I want to note is that I keep getting these twitches in my muscles all around my body. It was and still is on occasion in my left temple and now I feel like I have a baby kicking me in my tummy. There was another one in my left pointer toe a couple days ago. Just very random and odd places to be getting muscle spasms and so often too.
There is a mass I'm singing for this weekend and am very excited to be doing the solo communion hymn. This is something I've been wanting to do for years now and can't wait to get back into it, Rehearsals tonight and perform on Sunday! Wish me luck!

TFP makes me proud to be Catholic

God forgive them!Check out this Pro-marriage video.You know the saying actions speak louder than words, well this video is proof of it. For all the talk of Catholics being hate-filled, it's not hard to see who the real hate-filled folks are in this video. God save the USA from these horrible people.

Temple Twitches

Before going to bed last night, I noticed a very annoying twitch in my left temple. It actually seems to be above my ear, but radiates into the temple and makes my jaw twitch as well. It's still going on and have no idea what to do about it. I've had muscle spasms in my eye lid and in various parts of my body, but never here before.
Also, notices that I am getting little tiny blisters on my hands every morning again. They are red, slightly itchy and then go away in a day with little white dried skin scabs.
I really feel sick today though, almost like I am going to have an anxiety attack. My heart feels jittery and I am sensing that my adrenaline is pumping for some reason. It's like that fight or flight feeling I get when I want to get something done quickly. I tried calling an infectious disease doctor nearby to make an appointment, but they told me I need to have a referral to get one and I don't.
I took three Imunovirs this morning and am wondering if that is what's causing all these symptoms. It just that I want to feel better and I feel worse. What's happening to me?!

Father's Day Weekend Review

I had friends from back home over this weekend which was nice, but stressful too. We had five children under three in the house and it was a lot of work. I love having people over, but I just wish I had the stamina to deal with the stress that comes with it. Things were going well, save for the chronic headaches I had every day. I was off of Imunovoir for the past two days and yet I still got the headache. Ugh! Last night we went to bed around midnight, since we sat up talking with out friends, and then I got up twice in the night to go to the bathroom. And while I think the amount of sleep I got would have been enough sleep for me, I woke up today very tired and was dragging all day. And like I said before, besides being very tired, I got a splitting headache that lasted for hours. I tried to rest this afternoon, but it didn't give me any more energy :-(
With my chiro being limited, my neck pains are slowly coming back and I wonder if that's why I have the headaches.
I also noticed brown spots on my shin, leg and arm today. It might be caused by the Nattokinase or some other supplement, but I'm only guessing. The dizziness is also still with me and I am reconsidering having the tilt table test done. Being that the ENG showed that I have no inner ear conditions, it doesn't make sense that I would have dizziness so often at age 30. I read today that Chronic Fatigue Syndrome is linked with it, and I have been told by my natural MD that I have that, but what's causing that is still unknown.
At this point I am frustrated and just want to know who I can go to that can give me an answer. My mother tells me that I should see an infectious disease doctor, so that might just be my next stop. There is a huge wart that's been on the sole of my foot for 10 years and I want to have that removed asap, but I don't think that's associated with the other symptoms I've had in the last 10 months.
Stress levels were up this past week.

More symptoms

I have been on the Imunovir since Monday, again taking it two times a day. This week I found that more issues began to come up. For one, I've now started getting headaches everyday around 4pm. It can only be assumed that it's from the Imunovir since that's one of their possible side effects, but on top of that, I still am extremely weary and feel like napping every afternoon, which I never used to do before.
Also, there are now little itchy blisters on my hands every morning and they last throughout half the day and then go away. They are somewhat bothersome, but mostly just when I wake up. My hands also have begun swelling, though that might be due to my needing more water or to heat or some other factor.
My personal life has been ok.
We had our house exorcised by a Benedictine priest in the family since we've had odd events occur more recently and we felt that it would be good to clean our any unwanted guests. It's a little freaky, but that's why we have holy priests at our disposal right?
My son has been fussy and has this weird rash on his face. It surrounds his mouth and nose and is even starting to go up near his eyes. I have purchased oil of oregano since I read that might help heal it. I'm hoping it does since I don't like experimenting with medical ointments that might just make things worse.
Well, he is screaming for me to come give him his paci so I need to be going for tonight. Goodnight all and hope your lives are well.

ENT Update

I went to have an ENG test last week to see if the vertigo I've had since late February was due to any inner ear disorders. Well, I got my results back and they are normal (maybe I said that in a previous post?). Anyway, they want to do a tilt table test and I read about what it involves and I am totally against it! They basically give you these drugs to induce a panic attack so that your heart will race, they strap you to a table and then lift you up and down to see how you respond. Sometimes people reported that their heart stopped during this test. No way in the heck am I going to do that to myself. Where that leaves me though is in a state of ignorance as to what IS causing this dizziness. My natuiral MD of course tells me it's the candida, but no one anywhere discusses that correlation.  For now I will wait and see how I do without taking anything for it. The episodes are brief and mostly happen at night when I lie down or arise from bed. Things are spinning inside my head when I lay to the left side, but when I turn the right it sometimes gets better. Bottom line, I don't think it's so serious that I need to have the tilt table test, which I've also read is for people who experience fainting spells frequently.
Sleep has been touch and go since my son has been getting up at night screaming in fear. I rush in to get him and he won't stop crying unless I hold him or take him into bed with me. And when I do that, I don't get much sleep at all since he's rolling and kicking me. I love my little guy, but he is not making me happy with this sleep thing he's going through. On top of that, my husband and I have been staying up really late to watch movies so we don't get to sleep until 12 am and then the kids wake up at 6:30. No more late nights for us! well , not for tonight anyway. My little girl just came over to me with her dress soaking wet so I need to take it off and go get her something dry to wear, but all in all, I'm doing ok.
No Imunovir this week and I am feeling good. It starts next Monday again. I will be trying to avoid going to any more doctors since my insurance isn't as good as it was last year and the bills are starting to pile high :-( Time to just trust in God. Oh yes, and one more thing, on;y going to chiro once a month now since my insurance allows for only 5 more visits. Alright now I really need to run, little boy is screaming for  me!

Chronic Fatigue set sin

I've been off on the Diflucan for about three days now and I am so feeling the effects of it. My body feels as though it's been carrying an extra 20 lbs around with it. I feel worse than I have in awhile actually. The fatigue doesn't go away with any amount of sleep and I wake as exhausted as I fell asleep. I am calling Dr. P today and finding out what is going on. I read online today that Diflucan is not supposed to be used for long periods of time as it can cause liver dysfunction- great! That's all I need, right? I've been trying to keep the house running but it's like running upstream. I feel as though nothing is getting done and I have this force holding me back from doing anything. Please God nothing serious is going on but I worry because I don't think this is normal.
This week I am off of the Imunovir and will start up again next week. God give me strength I am so tired....

Reflections on pain

This is day three of the first week that I've been taking the triple dose of Imunovir three times a day and so far I actually feel fine. No chest pains even :-) My mood has been more relaxed despite the lack of change in my life and that is noteworthy. Issues with my hubby still arise, but at least I am not so overly anxious about them. I did get to mass one day this week and found that that really comforted my spirit and helped me deal with a very difficult temptation I've been struggling against. We're talking real temptation, not the, "I so want that piece of chocolate and can no longer resist," kind of stuff. The battles I face are the ones which are mortally threatening to my salvation and the desire to give up the fight is so appealing, especially when I am so overwhelmed with other issues in my life- like my health. Yet, in some ways, I think that God is using this mysterious malady of mine to strengthen me against these enemies of my soul, i.e. the world, the flesh and the devil. While I totally abhor the pain and the consternation these symptoms have caused in my marriage, in some way I believe that they're helping make me strong. Not necessarily strong physically, but rather it is humbling me to recognize my complete inability to be good without God and to show me that He will not leave me in my darkest hour and in Him I am made strong.  The sunny weather does help make for a chipper spirit too, but that's just a side note.
My daughter got out of her crib today after I put her in there for being naughty. I am downstairs and I hear this noise of a handle being turned. Rushing up the stairs I look to her door to discover she is standing there with this adorable look of guilt on her face- yes, it sounds like an oxymoron, but that's how she looked. I put her back into bed and of course she screamed, but oh well. So now I need to find a toddler bed. What does this have to do with maladies? Absolutely nothing, but being no one really reads this anyway, I thought I might add some non-relative personal  information just to make it interesting.
If you're a woman and you'd like to know of a good movie to watch, "The Amati Girls" is one I'd recommend. It's a great story about four sisters and the varying types of unhappiness they suffer in their marriages/lives. I rented it from the library since Netflix doesn't carry it, but for the love of me I cannot find the shell for the video and have to return it soon. St. Anthony, help me find where my little ones put it!

That's all for today, another good day and back issues are good- thanks  Dr. G.